spiralofhope

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(on Wikipedia)
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3316948/
https://web.archive.org/web/20180826122256/http://www.americanultrathemovie.com/

When attacked, an idiot stoner learns he has training he never knew he had.

An unintellectual fluffy bubblegum action movie. Easy on the brain and good for the common man. Not a spy movie as such. Recommended for beers and popcorn with friends. Still worth a watch for others who can just barely tolerate such brain-candy.

Ultra is probably a reference to Project MKUltra

• 1:00 — Does this immediately start with one of those bullshit after the fact things, with the entire movie being a fucking flashback narrated by the dude, so there is absolutely no suspension of disbelief as to the survival of the character?
• 2:20 — Not only does it do this, it has a fucking shark-jump epilepsy-inducing montage. Oh my god this is already bad.
• 2:30 — It started three days ago, in the town of .. Limon? Lyman? West Virginia .. I don’t think it’s Lyon Village, Arlington, Virginia.
• 2:40 — Fuck, I was hoping the epilepsy didn’t actually show Kristen Stewart, but there she is. She’s acting. Acting, I tell you.
• 3:50 — Oh, it’s Liman. I don’t know if that place is fictional or not.
• 4:10 — Panic attack
• 6:50 — Things no man things.
• 7:40 — Pebbles cereal
• 9:30 — George Bush Center for Intelligence, Fairfax County, Virginia
• 9:50 — Harry Potter, heh.
• I didn’t understand much of that mumbly phone call.
• Neoguri (instant noodle)
• 27:30 — If they were willing to kill everyone in there, then why not drone strike the building?
• 28:30 — Thank you for being reasonably realistic about bullet penetration.
• The song is To Be Loved (Forever), by The Pentagons.
• 30:15 — They had a grenade all this time.
• 35:10 — Anaphylaxis
• 35:25 — Amnesia
• 36:15 — M1 Abrams, Tank
• 41:25 — Neuralyzer
• 42:10 — Kettlebells on the floor.
• 43:45 — Coca-Cola can, in his hand.
• Incapacitating agent
• 47:15 — Ryofloxin(?) – and how does she know its name? Also, how does she know how to treat it?
• 49:00 — Oh, she’s his handler?
• 50:00 — Called it.
• 50:05 — Central Intelligence Agency
• 57:10 — His mother?
• 60:00 — Now they’re thinking about a drone strike..
• 63:50 — Gopher strike! Heh.
• 64:25 — Was that even cover?
• 64:30 — Unnecessary dickishness to a teddy bear.
• 65:00 — That dude’s behaviour is so predictable that I would have suspended and imprisoned him long ago.
• 66:00 — Drones can turn.
• 66:25 — There’s no way that record would be playing with dirt on it. Even if there were clean tracks, the needle would have easily been gunked up.
• 71:00 — Where’d he get the car from?
• I assume he brought the three or so guns from his fight at the house.
• 72:30 — I hope this movie will be over, soon.
• 79:00 — People can’t be strangled like that.
• 81:00 — The song is some shitty cover of (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher, by Jackie Wilson
• 82:40 — She also caused the deaths of military assets, the destruction of military property, and the destruction of civilian property.
• 85:50 — Manila, Philippines

• Ends with a stoner cartoon..