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(on Wikipedia)
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1583421/

An elite enemy group infiltrates the presidency of the United States, and initiates a plan to force the world into disarmament and submission.

A standard American action movie™ of no note.

• Properly titled G.I. Joe: Retaliation
• Based on the G.I. Joe toy / cartoon franchise.
• In association with Hasbro.

• Continues from G.I. Joe – The Rise of Cobra – (2009 movie)

• Everything Wrong With G.I. Joe: Retaliation In 22 Minutes Or Less

  • by CinemaSins
• 1:45 — That’s an incredibly obvious way to break into a fence.
• 4:30 — From the looks of it, he could have tipped the barrel over.
• 6:00 — There are way too many effects in this movie. Will the ending suck because they blew their budget?
• 6:45 — Wow, that butterfly-blow was an absolutely awful effect.
• 9:30 — Snake Eyes got cut through.

• 13:15 —

  • Kalashnikov rifle (likely AK-47s)
  • SVU Dragunov
  • Type 50
  • Cold War
• 14:00 — Jay-Z
• 18:15 — Montclair, Virginia – United States
• 20:15 — Karaoke
• 21:00 — Lee Harvey
• 22:45 — Bono

• 23:00 — Internship.

  • That’s a reference to Monica Lewinsky in the Clinton–Lewinsky scandal.[ 1 ]
• 34:00 — Snuggie
• 40:45 — How did he get weapons in there?
• 43:00 — It takes some time for that stuff to wear off..
• 48:00 — Waterboarding
• 52:45 — Where did they get all those armaments from?
• 57:00 — Uh, maybe actually say more about your good friend?
• 59:00 — zemaboble(?) .. emaborgirl(?)
• 1:03:45 — Phew, almost hurt a woman.
• 1:08:15 — God thing he saved the woman.

• 1:10:00 —

  • Fox News
  • “Fair and Balanced” was their first slogan.
  • Also, the “president” would recognize her.
• 1:10:45 — Would he have strands of hair, given the nature of his transformation?
• 1:12:30 — So.. so they were having a dance right next to a bad neighborhood?
• 1:20:00 — Yeah yeah, women being women because wahmen.
• 1:22:45 — Did they suddenly turn off the lights?
• 1:25:00 — The rest of the buttons jiggled.
• 1:27:30 — Fort Sumter – South Carolina – United States

• 1:31:00 — So the thing about nukes and the whole armament thing is the idea of mutually-assured destruction. All those other countries would retaliate without pause. Or at least one would.

  • 1:31:45 — .. like that. Though without them all needing briefcases are their own.
• 1:33:00 — Phew, a woman almost got hurt.
• 1:34:30 — Not all nukes would have been launched.
• 1:38:00 — They’re already being dropped in sequence, all they would have to do is destroy the case.
• 1:50:00 — The case is locked. Roll credits.

• 1:51:00 — All he needed to do is squish the bug, but it wasn’t established that they were tough or anything.

Footnotes

1. I find it curious that she isn’t immediately linked-to in the first sentence of the article. [ ↩ ]